Japercation - Geekly/Weekly

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check
when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

What is the speed of darkness?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

Do you cry under water?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at
things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder...... Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm going to eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they
ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (This one kills me!!!!)

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
.................Stop singing and read on .......................

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you
take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Do you ever wonder why you gave me you look at this blog in the first place?

Dont wory its not a rant about piracy just wantedto share this

Enjoy. ps- song is by dan bull you can check out the video below or join his myspace at; http://www.myspace.com/danbull

Like a girlfriend. (from a jaded satire point of view)

It doesn't do anything i want it to.

It doesn't get turned on when i want to play.

It stops me playing with my friends.

It always tells me i cant do something.

It always needed new accersories.

It always got overheated over the small things

It always made an irritating noise when i didn't want it to.

It'll cost me a fortune to keep it.

I can't live with it.

I can't live without it.

sorry if it offends anyone (like i said before its a pitiful attempt at satire.) if you want thought provoking views see the post before this.

ttyl guys

have you ever wondered why things always seem to jump up at you at the last second and drag you away from the really important things in life. whilst its always the "other" things that you'd prefer to be doing.

Welcome my friends to life, and well to say its simple would be a gross miscalculation. The world is full of exciting and wonderful things, be it the small infantesimally small things you do to get by, to the really momentous occassions, or even the joy of just seeing a friend after far to long of being apart. But its always these things that your dragged kicking and screaming away by the terrors of life.

I know i've been dragged away from far too many things over the recent times by things I thought important. things that I wanted to do or things I thought people expected of me. As a trainee games designer (if such a thing exists) it's my job to enjoy the good things in life, the fun, the laughter, the characters and the story. Lets face it how many games have you played which have lacked the fun to keep you playing. Yet, even though i should be absorbing as much of this as possible and splurging it out onto paper, i've been stuck doing work I thought needed to be done, and its taken over more and more of my time when i think of how much I need to do it.

truth is, its a campaign for toy soldiers, IT'S NOT F**g important and yet i feel like I need to work at it. This document has taken me from my friends and my family because of what I thought.

y'know what though, i've realised its not important, because the people imdoing it for, wont judge me or mock me, and the not so painful truth, i haven't met many who would. Yet i've been worrying over it for a LOOOOOOOOOONG time.

So the morale of the story? there is none, im not good at righteous talk, but if you get hooked on something you think is important...just step back a little, and you'll see that all of these wonderful things in life, are far more important than anything.

hopefully next week will be a bit cheerier.

oh and SoC the campaign maybe a bit late

so from the introduction you'll have realised that i call myself a geek? well what exactly is a geek. Is it someone how sits infront of a computer all day, playing games, working talking to friends. or is it a guy / or girl who collects something out of the norm, like Roleplaying games, or even Warhammer.

well look into the dictionary and what do you see.
Geek (noun)
An Awkward Person

is this right that an awkward person should be labelled, or stigmatised a geek because they are awkward? i'm sure we've all felt out of place, or like we couldn't fit in at sometime. Does that mean that everyones a geek? does that mean were all Nerdy kids wearing glasses and slowly getting square eyes as they look into the monitor and see the latest bill gates has decided to create. I don't think so, in fact i know so, it's human nature to try and fit in. We're like horses, without the long face and we don't get shot if we fall over whilst carrying a midget over some hedges. (ok so maybe we're not like horses after all) 

but what does a horse do if it eventually shakes that annoying midget of it's back. (sorry to any jockeys out there) Does it curve off to the side and say "thank god thats over" no, and if you think it did, i think you should see someone about that. The Horse chases, even leads the rest of the group, it wants to fit in. IT tries so hard to be with the rest of them.

so maybe next time you see a kid slumped over a computer, just think. He's not a geek. He just the same as you but without the annoying midget

 

 

PS.  A Geek is actually an outrageous Carnival performer. Thats right, bet you never thought us social rejects could show off could you   whose act consists of outrageous feats such as biting the heads off live animals. 

Ozzy Osbourne the king of geeks

Welcome Everyone

Firstly i'd like to point out, i'm a geek. I do a computer game design course of course im a geek, and is this blog a celebration of that geekyness. maybe, maybe not. I hope it'll turn into the world through my eyes. It maybe funny, it maybe sad. It maybe completely manic and you think i need a shrink, well ok thats probably a lot of the time, but this is the way i see things, and sometimes i see things through a kaliedoscope.

But i think i've said enough. Welcome to my world, leave your sanity at the door.